Sunday, April 16, 2017

Consequential Dormancy

What makes the perfect concoction of life?  Every mix varies based on the person and how you determine the right mix for you is really up to how you choose to life your life.  There's nothing more complicated than human behaviour.  Most people should say what they mean, and back up what they say by what their actions.  That's probably one of the most complicated rules of life anyone attempts to follow, owning up to your truth.  So therefore, we need a mix that contains truth, deception, false hope, joy, honesty, yet sugar coated, or do we need all of those factors?

What are the ingredients that make everything worth while?  How can you reach your best potential?  Who or what outside factors interfere in these ingredients? 

Do you ever find yourself feeling incomplete?  We've all been there at some point. Some ingredients aren't always meant to last forever.  One can interpret these ingredients as anything to do with your life that is an outside influence.  When certain ingredients evaporate out of the mix of life, replace them with something better or increase what you know and can do better.  Life is always changing and we're like a recipe, spicing it up can have negative or positive effects on the taste.  Take notes and learn from these changes.

Remaining dormant throughout certain situations can cause several consequences as well.  I made the poor decision to halt writing for a few years to focus on other aspects of my life, such as a much needed reunion, increased hours at the job, spending more time traveling and seeing what the world has to offer, and dealing with situations out of my control.

The family ingredient caused a forced dormancy on what should be priority one in my life, my health and my well being.  For the past eight months, my focus has shifted from my norm to focusing on defense and support, counteracting those who fail to own their truth.  The family ingredient has changed, that recipe had to have several items removed and increased measurements of others.

The work ingredient went through some changes in those months as well resulting in a shift from my daily normalcy to a world I was loosely familiar with and forced an adaptation that has worked out rather well for me.  This mixture became more positive in the end and is still growing more in that direction.

The friend ingredient has shifted dramatically within the past 3 years of my last post.  Several people needed to be removed from the mix as their toxicity began to take a toll on my well being.  One could view this change like a Star Wars mix.  A few years ago, I surrounded myself with many people, several of which, I haven't seen in years or even been cordial to out in a public setting, what a mistake that was overall, but one can't adapt from being mistake free all the time.  My friends in 2014 could be compared to a setting in the prequel trilogy of Star Wars, a massive selection but you only really remember the key players.  In 2017, it's more like the original trilogy, where just a key handful of people play a role in my life causing a much better concoction of the friend ingredient that contains a strong serving of truth and honesty.  Take note people, this doesn't come so easily.  When you find it, don't fuck it up!

In this evidence, my body suffered immensely from the weight of the pressure around me.  My workouts became a routine of going through the motions just to say I was still working out but wasn't giving 100%.  If I was still showing up and completing them, then I could eat and do whatever I want, right?  Completely wrong, big sign of consequential dormancy.  I let myself relapse into focusing on everything else that was going on so that I would take comfort in eating whatever I wanted and being lazy, less focused on what I needed to do.  Granted, I was still there for those closest to me whenever they needed me, that didn't change, in fact, I focused more on that.

February 17th of this year, I began returning to my form that inspired the beginning of this blog.  Standing on that treadmill that morning weighing 260 humiliating pounds, I set forth on a journey to repeat the result from Winter 2009/Spring 2010 and create some magic again.  If there's something I am good at, it is losing weight when my heart is dedicated to it.  I am on week 9 right now, and in the first 8 weeks, I have worked out at least 6 hours a week, capping out at 8.5 hours within 5 days each week allowing two consecutive days for rest each week.  In those 8 weeks, I have gone from 260 pounds to 220 pounds, a feat I achieved in 2010 as well by losing 20 pounds each month for three consecutive months.  Can I do that again?  I'm not sure a third month is possible but I'm not going to give up and keep on trying.  The difference this time is that I'm 100% healthy on this journey and knowing what I need to do.  I have more muscle all over my body which changes the results somewhat, but hey, it's a big change from when I would spend 2 hours a day in my room running on the WiiFit due to the shyness I felt about working out in public.

So, the past 3 years will be revisited at some point in this blog, albeit not today.  I can safely say though, the ingredients in my current mixture have been changed for the positive in 2017.  2016 was not that kind to me overall but that just makes 2017 a guarantee to be an improvement right?  You'll get someone who doesn't regret those mistakes, but is taking those mistakes, owning up to their impact in life, while putting a stop to their impact, turning their influence into a positive setting.  My main goal is to reach 200 pounds by my birthday, July 5th.  I don't know if that will happen but I guarantee that I will not give up and do all that I can (in a healthy way) to get there.  So far, so good.
Take a dash of good work, pinch of family, extra servings of amazing friends, add those to the ingredient of a happy healthy Tommy, mix, bake at 400 degrees and get an amazing loyal friend named Tommy as a result.  Keep him close and you'll forever be close to him.

*I know this isn't the best of my writing abilities, but remember I'm rusty and working to regain the magic I once had :)*

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